


Rekindled Embers

by WindMeister8



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Firefighters, Cancer, F/M, Fire, Firefighters, Neighbors, Pregnancy, Suicide Attempt, carbon monoxide poisoning, labor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-19
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-21 03:09:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10676445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindMeister8/pseuds/WindMeister8
Summary: He loved his job - the joy of seeing the smiles on people's faces was all the satisfaction he needed. Never had he hesitated when he faced the dangers and risks that came with his occupation. He always figured he would die in the line of duty while saving lives. But when a visit to the doctor brings bad news, his life is plunged into a darkness that he doesn't think he can recover from... Until a helping hand from the most unlikely of places reaches out to him.





	Rekindled Embers

**Author's Note:**

> **(AU Note: For maximum effect, listen to[this](https://listenonrepeat.com/?v=FQ-vz2gNoUM&s=6&e=285#%E8%8F%AF%E6%99%A8%E5%AE%87_-_%E7%85%99%E7%81%AB%E8%A3%A1%E7%9A%84%E5%A1%B5%E5%9F%83_piano_cover))**

With a yank, the last strip of the parcel tape was stretched along the sides of the dirtied window, sealing the small cracks. The short statured man took a step back to inspect his work, his grey eyes passing over every inch of the glass. Satisfied that no gaps remained, he threw the parcel tape onto the brown couch. Everything was in order and waiting for him to take next step.

He looked out the window and into the apartment opposite him, barely ten feet separating the two buildings. Though the layout of his unit was mirrored in that apartment, its owner had tried to decorate the miserable 225 square feet of space with bright colors and secondhand furniture salvaged from garage sales. He saw no point in doing that, leaving the interior of his apartment drab and pretty much vacant, save for the couch and wardrobe. 

Of course in his case, it was different since he was the sole person living in this dump that couldn’t even be called home. But he knew that the owner across from him was soon to be welcoming a new arrival into her place and she probably wanted to do her best for the small parcel of joy. Each day, he had noticed her belly growing bigger and bigger, while her eyes sagged more and more out of exhaustion.

Not once had he seen the man responsible for the life resting in her belly, although sometimes he would see a female friend drop by once in a while to check in on her. He didn’t need to see who the father of the baby was though; it was probably some dead beat guy, who took off as soon as he knew of the pregnancy. Probably best it happen that way, rather than a feckless father who did nothing but take out his anger on the wife.

She survived pretty well by herself anyway. But that would change once the baby was born. Not that it mattered anymore since he won’t be able to see what happens to the mother and child. 

He tore his gaze away from the window, head swiveling as he took two steps towards the bare kitchen situated across from the couch. The small countertop was void; he had cleared the remnants of his last meal earlier on. With a turn of his wrist, the gas stove clicked on, a gentle hiss escaping.

Returning to the couch, he slumped down on its worn cushion, the springs protesting with a squeak as it took his weight. A month ago, the sound it made would have been twice as piercing since his weight was double that of his current scrawny frame. It was astonishing how quickly the cancer had took hold of him. Every time he looked into the mirror, he felt like a different person was reflected back. The skinny body where muscles once rested, the thin hair which used to bother him as it blocked his gaze, the sunken eyes which once sparkled with ferocity and courage…. 

Where had that person gone to? It was like his soul had just left him ever since he had received the doctor’s solemn diagnosis, the words carrying his death sentence still ringing in his ears.

“It’s fairly common in your line of work…. Maybe two-thirds of firefighters contract some form of cancer. I’m sorry.”

He had dedicated his life to saving people, risking it all to plunge headfirst into blazing fires, all the while thinking that if he were to die, it would be in the course of duty. And now he was to be sentenced to death by this… disease? Did it even make sense? Where was his justice? Who was going to save him now?

He closed his eyes, resting his head on top of the couch. The answer was simple. If he were to leave this world, it would be by his own hands. His way.

Mentally, he checked off the list of to-dos. He had eaten his last meal. Packed his meager belongings into a single suitcase. Left the rest of the things he no longer had a need for in front of his opposite neighbor’s apartment. She may be able to put it to good use for herself and the baby after all. 

That was all. Now all he needed to do was go to sleep, and the carbon monoxide would take care of the rest. What a miserable life after all….

 

….but what was that obnoxious banging? Drifting in the darkness, his ears picked up on the terribly loud noise. He hoped whoever it was would just leave but the sound only increased in intensity until the crashing of his door shook him awake. His eyelids barely opening a crack, he saw a shadow loom over him.

“…hey…. Hey!”

His vision blurring and refocusing, he made out the figure of a woman bent over him. His eyebrows knitted as he tried to fall back into that dark inviting abyss. But she was grabbing him by the shoulders, shaking him like a rag doll, forcing him to return to the world of the living. He swatted her arm away, wanting her to leave but she merely persisted in her efforts.

“What the hell are you doing??” she shouted.

Wincing at the loud noise, he scrunched his nose in irritation. “Just leave me,” he mumbled.

Through slit eyes, he caught a glimpse of her turning off the gas stove before returning to his side. “What were you thinking?! You could die in this-“

“That’s the idea,” he interrupted her harshly. “Now will you just go??”

She snorted, one hand pinching her nose. “No way am I going to leave you. You can’t just die like this!!”

Frustrated with her meddling into his well-thought plans, he lifted himself into a sitting posture. The toxic fumes he had inhaled immediately brought on a strong queasiness and he held his head to steady himself. Giving her a sidelong glare, he spat, “What’s it to you?”

“R-really?” She shook her head in disbelief. “You don’t know me? Me – your opposite neighbor? You just left a box of crap outside my apartment, remember that??”

“Yeah.” He wheezed, dismissing her with a wave of his hand. “So? Why do you care if I die?”

Her eyes narrowed in understanding, her lips pursing together in a thin line before she spoke quietly. “Because you’re the kindest soul I’ve met. That’s why.”

Clicking his tongue, he turned his head away. He was too disgusted with himself to openly admit it, let alone hear her say that. Kindness… where had that gotten him?

“Don’t think I don’t know,” she added. “Yes, your creepy face scares the shit out of me sometimes but you’ve been leaving little morsels of food and things like health care packets outside my door. You think I wouldn’t know it was you?”

He remained silent, his gaze fixated on the small little holes in the couch, unwilling to look her in the eye. 

Her voice turned softer as she pressed on. “We all have our own reasons for not wanting to live on, but as long as we do live, there’ll always be hope. I don’t know your story... but I know you do all these things… because you want to.”

“I just want you to know that everything you do for me… and for everyone else… it’s really appreciated. I-I don’t know how to repay you. Honestly,” she trailed off. “But I want to help you get through this.”

Gulping, he closed his eyes, preventing the welling tears from falling down his cheeks. He had spent his whole life doing things for other people, his payment being the smiles on their faces that brought him so much pride and satisfaction. But when he himself faced such a dark period in his life, there was no one there to save him, no one to take his hand and remind him… that at least one person cared for him.

He tilted his head to the side, sneaking a glance at her, only for his eyes to widen in shock when he saw her clutching her belly. A guttural groan escaped her throat as water seeped onto the light wooden floor. As she caught his gaze, she crumpled to the floor, her breath coming out in uneven gasps.

“My…m-my water just broke… I… think,” she said in between grunts of pain.

Staring at the scene in front of him, his mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. His mind went blank but shaking his head, he snapped out of his trance. Years of experience kicked in and he swung his legs off the couch, crouching beside her.

“I’m going to take you to a hospital, alright? You’re going to be just fine. Don’t panic.” Seeing her bob her head up and down, he wrapped one arm around her shoulder and the other under her knees. He tested her weight before slowly lifting her up, his legs bearing the strain. Almost buckling under the combined weight, he staggered backwards before regaining his balance.

Huffing lightly, he pressed her closer to his body and broke into a brisk walk. Not even bothering to close the door as he exited the apartment, he rushed down the corridor and into the stairwell.

“Hnrgh,” she groaned, “I’m not due for a week yet! Why did the baby have to come now?!”

“It’ll be fine,” he said soothingly as he raced down the staircase as fast as he could. His body was screaming in agony and his vision still a little blurry from the effects of the carbon monoxide but he pushed himself to the limit, knowing that he had a mission to accomplish.

Out on the street now, he turned left, heading towards the hospital. Calling the ambulance would take too long but he figured he would be able to get her there faster by himself. He could see the towering white building from afar as he forced his legs to move faster.

“Nooooo….” She screamed in agony, her fingers digging into his back. “It’s coming out now!! I can’t stand it!!”

“Soon, we’ll be there soon!”

“Ahhhh!” Squirming in his hold, she writhed as the contractions grew stronger.

Realizing that they won’t make it in time, he stopped and looked around. Strangers stared at them but ignoring their curious gazes, he frantically searched for a backup plan. Sweat poured down his forehead, his breath strenuous.  Suddenly recalling the presence of a nearby convent, he started off again, doubling his pace.

Her screams growing louder every second, his heart pounded furiously as he tore down the streets and back alleys. Finally reaching the small rundown convent, he burst through the doors.

“I need help!” he yelled at the top of his lungs.

As two women dressed in the habit of a nun rushed to his side, he said, “She’s in labor.”

They hurriedly ushered him to one of the rooms and laying her down on the bed, he stepped back as they took charge. A doctor was instantly brought in and they set about preparing for the delivery. One of the nuns calmly asked him to leave the room and despite his anxiety, he nodded reluctantly. As he moved away from the bedside, a hand gripped his wrist, stopping him in his tracks. Turning his head, he saw the mother-to-be’s face contort in pain as another strong contraction rippled through her body. 

Letting out a long breath, she opened her eyes and looked up at him, beads of sweat dripping down her forehead. “I… I didn’t get your name.”

He hesitated before squeezing her hand reassuringly. “It’s Levi.”

And that was all he could say before he was steered out of the room. Noticing his pallid face, the nun had wanted to examine him as well but he declined any treatment, opting instead to sit and wait. Taking up a position across the room, he sat on the edge of the wooden bench, resting his arms on his knees as he bowed his head.

Every few seconds or so, he could hear a plaintive cry from the room, wincing each time as he imagined the agony she was going through. The baby was inching its way out into life earlier than it was supposed to and he kept on wondering whether that was his fault. Could the exposure to carbon monoxide have accelerated the process somehow? Even if it hadn’t, the timing was too coincidental and if anything happened to her or the baby, he could never live with himself.

He had never intended to hurt anyone by taking his own life but it seemed like he had failed miserably in that respect. Burying his head in his hands, he gritted his teeth in anger. He had jeopardized the one person who had extended a helping hand to him in his time of need and he didn’t know what to do with himself.

Maybe he could sneak back to his apartment and finish what he had started. Only this time there would be no interruptions. Leaning forward, he made to get up when the door opened, the nun exiting the room with a smile on her face.

Her hands clasped together, she walked towards him. “The delivery was a success. I believe the lady inside would like to see you.”

Mumbling a small “Thank you, Sister”, he stepped towards the room, hesitating at the door. The doctor who was just finishing up flashed him a small smile, patting his shoulder as he brushed past him. His eyes shifting to the sole occupants in the room, he bit the inside of his cheek as the newly delivered mother lifted her gaze to meet his.

“Come here.” She gestured with a tilt of her head, a warm glow gracing her face.

He hesitated, his hand reaching to cup the back of his head. When she raised her eyebrows at him, he jerked into motion, crossing over to her bedside and taking a seat on the stool beside it.

Her arms lowered, inclining so that he could see the little baby resting comfortably in her embrace. His heart skipped a beat as he took in the beautiful bundle of life, the baby’s small feet kicking away healthily as one thumb pressed against its small lips. An audible gasp of relief escaped him, his thin lips curving upwards.

“I would like you to meet little Levi. I wanted to name him after you – our benefactor, as thanks for everything you’ve done for us,” she whispered softly.

With those few words, the heavy load that had always weighed over him suddenly lifted, his soul feeling infinitely lighter. Gulping, he choked down a sob, a trembling hand covering his mouth. He looked at her, his eyes conveying all that he felt – his guilt, his joy, his gratitude. She merely nodded in response, the maternal smile never leaving her lips. 

“Go ahead. You can touch him if you like.”

He gave a nervous chuckle, his fingers reaching out to lightly brush the infant’s pink cheeks. How soft to the touch it was. This was the life he had helped bring into the world, named after him. His lifeline, his anchor.

A single tear rolling down his cheek, his eyes flickered back to her. “Thank you….” His tone ending in an upward inflection, he trailed off in a silent question of her name.

“(F/N).”

_You’re my savior._


End file.
